Sunday's gloom.

A horrible Saturday night,
awaking to a terrible Sunday morning.
and it will follow with a horrendous day,
numbing me when I awake Monday morning.

Indifference.

Its not the anger or the shouting;
Its the sheer annoyance and indifference.

Its not how hot-tempered you can get,
but how cold you can be.

It is not being able to accomodate to one tiny request I beg for.
which is never to hang up.

Square One.

Being with you is riding pillion on a bike; I will always have a higher risk of dying if we fall.
Which are the reasons for my cautiousness.

I wrote once about how its an animal's instinct to run/attack if its feeling vulnerable.
This is why I need a break.
Im back to square one when I told you I dont know.
And you told me I have to know whats wrong to know whats right.
And I trusted you to be the 'right'.
Now I dont know again.

But this time its different.
I do know how much I need you,
I know for sure how much you mean to me,
I know for sure that you'll be the only one I love,

But I'm back to where i dont know about you and what it will be.

And Im too tired to worry this time,
and Im too tired to try,

I thought I could let it be, but I lost faith.
It has been too many things on my mind uncleared over a long time.
Now, even being by your side does not even chase these thoughts away anymore.




How can we be sure we're not just one of them?

Causes of my Unheard Grievances

Few things that have been on my mind, randomly.

-guys with porn collections.
-seemingly perfect couples having fights
-possibility of not being the one and only.
-never being able to be the first.
-doing things with someone who has done things with someone else.
-comparing myself to others.
-being compared to others.
-leaving home.
-having cancer.

will elaborate if i have time and feel like it.